Saturday, November 19, 2005

Housework or not

Friday Radio Question of the Day: On a scale of one to ten, 21 percent of people give themselves a 9, for this. What is it?


My husband Niks teased and shamed me into skipping a day of blogging on Friday. I have to admit that I sneaked in a little blog stuff in the evening. I didn't post, but I left a few comments. Not that many. So it's okay. Right?

We all play our little tricks on our roommates I think. Niks does it himself, only he would never admit it. I always cook all of our meals. I always clean up after them too. I gave up on getting any help on that long ago. But once in a while I'll have a meeting or something that I have to do and he'll say that he'll clean up after supper while I'm out.

Then he always sits down and watches TV instead of cleaning up. When he hears the garage door opening on my return, he jumps up and starts loading the dishwasher. The automatic garage opener we have now is so quiet, and his hearing is so bad, that these days he doesn't jump up until I walk inside. That guy. He's a complete time slob. Always tries to act as if he's been busy while I'm out.

His idea of helping with the housework is to lift his feet up so that I can run the vacuum under them. But he's usually not devious.

Now, me, I'm devious. I cover up my goofing off. If I've been on the computer all morning and he's downstairs thinking I'm doing housework upstairs, I'm perfectly capable of quickly scattering some stuff around that will make it look as if I've been doing something more productive than blogging.

Before the computer took so much of my time I had other time-wasters of course. Mostly just reading. Once when I was a stay-at-home mom and had wasted the day, I realized I should do something to make it look as if I had a good reason to be "too tired to cook." I put up the ironing board, drug about 40 little dresses out of the girls' closets and hung them around the room, making it look as if I had been ironing all day. It worked.

One good hint I could give you folks is to start a big job really close to the time your partner will be returning home. That way, you'll still be doing it when he or she gets home. You'll get more credit for the chore that way. Plus, it's possible he or she will pitch in and help. This works better if you have covered the kitchen table with the mess you're making with this chore. You can generally get a restaurant meal out of that.

Any time the spouse is away, stay away from chores that s/he has been nagging you to do. Anything that a spouse has been nagging at you to get done should be done when the spouse is home to see you doing it. Sigh a lot. Bonus points.

Of course, I offer these tips in hopes of helping you have a more harmonious relationship. Would I lie?

Answer to the radio question of the day: Keeping the house clean. Try calling in sick on that one.

19 comments:

Saur♥Kraut said...

Whee! I'm the first poster in here. My Other Half sounds just like YOUR Other Half! This is not an encouraging revelation.

mireille said...

Brilliant! TLP, you're brilliant! Worth the price for the tip about doing their pet project in front of them! Brilliant!

Ivy the Goober said...

ha ha, have you ever tried leaving the mess for so long to see if HE gets tired of it enough to clean it up? And then he DOESN'T and it's just that much harder for YOU? yeah, uhhh me neither...

Lucy said...

lol..you won't believe this - but recently i spent much of the day..reading blogs and forums. 15 min. before DH got home - i washed and dryed my hair, made the bed, emptied the dishwasher and threw in a load of laundry. A new record - usually i give myself 30 min.

Doug said...

Deviousness is such a great skill. Plus, there's no way to fake it.

Peter said...

Hi Lucy, I'm glad I didn't discover blogging until after my divorce, (I would have had todevelop deviousness) also glad I was no longer working.
I'm glad about that on so many levels by the way.

AP3 said...

You are devious!

Fred said...

TLP, devious? Never.

Tom & Icy said...

Wonder how many do that at work?

Mike said...

I must say, I'm impressed! Although, I'm a lot like Niks, I usually wait until she's about home to start mine. By the way, I'm not letting Trish read this post. No way. No how.

Tan Lucy Pez said...

Thanks to all of you for stopping by. I could give you guys LOTS of tips. But I won't. I could write a book on how to sluff off and never get caught. Well almost never get caught.

Hint: Find something small and easy that will almost immediately get their maximum attention. Then DON'T do that chore. WAIT until they are away. You goof off all day or whatever, THEN right before they come home, do that small easy thing. They see it right away. Big best-seller.

actonbell said...

Great post! And I always wondered why the clothes in my closet didn't stay in the same order...

Libby said...

TLP, i have one better! get a bucket of hot water, pour pine-sol in it, put it in front of a register...smells like you've been cleaning ALL DAY!...you said you're devious? HA!
BoUnCeS!! LibbY!

lime said...

lucy, i bow humbly at the feet of a master. youare my hero!

Tan Lucy Pez said...

Acton B. Yep. I had to use those dresses.

Oh, LibbY- You are smart girl! Everybody got that?

Lime- I blush.

Jamie Dawn said...

You are a smart one! Your hubby is no match for your devious nature.

Klondike Kate said...

I'm totally taking your advise next I get the chance. Right now I just ignore it and the evil roommate gets up and does it.

Savtadotty said...

You mean there's something more productive than blogging?

Amber said...

I thought I was the only one doing that, TLP! LOL!

You know what finally made a deep impression upon my husband? When he saw me wiping off all the phones and the doorknobs one day. He was thunderstruck!

"I didn't know you did that!" he said.

Well, I don't very often. But the point is, he saw me doing it one and he was very impressed. And very respectful whenever I said I was tired from cleaning after that.

Or maybe he's respectful because he's afraid I'm a nutcase and he doesn't want to set me off. One or the other. Not sure which. heh