Sunday, September 18, 2005

Idle chatter

Saturday before last, husband Niks and I went to a surprise birthday party for a woman who is turning 70. There were some young people there, but they were her children and their children. The friends in attendance were all over age sixty. A lot of us have a long history together.

We don't seem that old. To each other. But we got to talking about how old we are, and are gettin’ to be, and thinking about what it all means. Not one of us has figured life out yet.

We decided that there are some pretty good things about getting to our age, like our supply of brain cells is finally down to a manageable size. And the clothes we put away until they come back in style... have come back in style.

Plus there's nothing left to learn the hard way. We don't bother trying to hold in our stomachs, no matter who walks into the room. We all agree that "Happy Hour" now means getting a nap in. And "getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot. We can share our secrets with each other because none of us will remember any of them anyway.

It's true that when people call at 9 PM they ask, "Did I wake you?" And the answer is, "Hell yes, and since you know that, why did you call?" But really, most of us don't have any enemies. Well, there's gravity. I have come to the conclusion that my worst enemy is gravity. Gravity never quits.

Most of the men have ears which are hairier than their heads. And their idea of weight lifting is standing up. Now when they talk about "good grass" they're referring to their lawn. Some even talk about the options on their new easy chair the way they used to talk about the options on their new cars.

Half of these folks got cable for the weather channel. Old Folks MTV! But almost all of us have PC's and e-mail. Except the birthday girl. She's a hold-out.

But oh, we remember fondly things like sitting on the curb at night under a streetlight just talking; hide-and-seek; Simon Says; going home for lunch; hopscotch; skates with keys; jacks; wax lips; saddle shoes; coke bottles with the names of cities on the bottom; bobby pins; Mickey Mouse Club; Rocky and Bullwinkle; American Bandstand...in black and white. Your mother made you turn off the TV when there was a thunderstorm.

Remember the Stroll? Sock hops? My very first date was to a sock hop. Yes, we danced in our socks. Because our street shoes would have ruined the gym floor. Sneakers were for gym class, not for dancing.

We even talked fondly about things that were a nuisance at the time. Like it used to take at least five minutes for the TV to "warm up." Like that. And when we wore nylons that were two pieces.

We remember lying on our backs on the grass with friends and saying things like "That cloud looks like a (fill in the blank.)"

We remember when stuff from the store came without safety caps and hermetic seals, because no one could imagine trying to poison a perfect stranger. Or an imperfect one for that matter.

Now some in our group have to ask the pharmacy to package their medicines in containers that aren't childproof, because they have arthritis. It's either that or get a small child to come open it for you. Kids can usually get'em open with no problem.

You'll be happy to know that I'm going to quit this. I feel all melancholy now.

32 comments:

mireille said...

how do you pack so many gems into one post? The brain cells down to a manageable size. The weather channel: MTV for old folks. Another great one. Not to be morbid, but hope you have these saved to a file if/when blogger dies. xoxo

still life said...

This coming from the woman who has to be one of the sharpest cookies out there.
OK, I'll let you slide this one time. I remember before they used to have to check candy on Halloween, when you just couldn't eat the open ones.
How did you get to be so funny anyway?

Libby said...

TLP...
this is great! my husband & i always talk about the stuff our kids & grandchildren will never see...some good, some bad...
BoUnCeS!! LibbY!

kenju said...

Love this post, Tan Lucy. I've been doing some remembering too.

Doug said...

That was a beautiful post, TLP. So you guys had school gyms, huh? I guess that was before rows of gamestations and feeding tubes.

Sum kinda princess said...

Wow, feeling a little nestalgic? or however you spell it. I love the post, you are hilarious. comes easy to ya huh?

Jamie Dawn said...

What a really lovely post, TLP. I like the part about not holding your stomach in anymore. I got a bit melancholy too, even as I was smiling as I read. I was thinking about how over time, the things that used to be SO important seem almost silly now. Who cares if my tummy has some extra rolls? Who cares if my hair is fine as chicken feathers and will never be like Farrah Fawcett's was? (Oh, I sure wanted that kind of hair!)
Who cares if ...
Your post reminds me that I'm glad to just be here, enjoying my life with my loved ones and connecting with my fellow bloggers whom I have never seen. We are sharing this planet now, and I am thankful.

AP3 said...

Yeah, great post. I actually am old enough to remember a lot of what you mention... so you're OLD enough that your BABY daughter is gettin' old!

veej said...

wow, great post, tlp. it's good to walk down memory lane (athritis and all) reminiscing just makes you all younger inside!

Meegan said...

I loved this!!! So many things in here I never knew about. I never thought about why a sock hop was called a sock hop.

Doug said...

How're you feeling this morning?

Minka said...

Great post and so funny. My favourite saying this time: "Happy Hour" now means getting a nap in. And "getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot. I can hear my mom through you!

OldHorsetailSnake said...

Very fine reminisce, Lucy.

Wax lips! I had forgotten all about wax lips. Missing some synapses (but not the ones that allow me to spell synapse).

Sum kinda princess said...

I just noticed when you click on my "sum kinda princess" it only brings you to my dashboard. Yikes, what happened to my blog? I'll have to work on that. my blog address is really -- ambermum.blogspot.com

Tom & Icy said...

You stir up a lot of memories and feelings.

Big Dave T said...

Very well said. Funny and sad at the same time.

Getting cable TV for the weather channel, though. No way. I actually wrote a letter to my city council protesting The Weather Channel. Previously, our cable TV only had the national weather service local radar, with a voiceover. That was great! Could always see the storms coming and the weather was always local.

Now the weather channel has 30 minutes of national weather or fluff, 20 minutes of commercials, and ten minutes of local weather. Bring back the national weather service!

Fred said...

Great post. Me and The Missus have known each other for 24 years and are always reminiscing about things like this.

I'm printing it out as we speak. I'm going out in a few minutes to have a glass of wine; she'll get a kick out of your post.

actonbell said...

Great post! Things sure have changed.

Savtadotty said...

I am so right there with you - I even blogged a photo of my skate key on January 12!

BarbaraFromCalifornia said...

A truly touching post, and one very close to my heart....

If you do figure out life, please, please let me in on the secret!

Lightning Bug's Butt said...

A wonderful post. I loved this. Nostalgic and beautiful.

How old are you, anyway?

Tan Lucy Pez said...

LBB: I'm older than dirt. Dirt is exactly 63 years old. I will be 64 in November. Husband's older than God. Husband is going to be 77 in a few days. (Heads up daughters.) So I guess God's about 78, or maybe 1 million. Somewhere's around there. Could be more.

Doug 1: Before that silly ping pong on tv even. And I remember the first tv dinners. UGH!

Doug 2: Nervous. Owen's still in the lower 48. In N.C. making somebody miserable there. I'll relax when he's back in Alaska.

Mireille: Blogger could die? Jeez. Nobody tells me nuttin'.

Still Life: You're lucky to have trick or treated before the "SCARE" began.

Libby: Yeah, but look at the things they might see. The moon and beyond.

kenju: Thanks!

Sum Kinda Princess 1: I like the way you spell nostalgic. Makes me nestalgic for my home nest. (2)That happens on everyone's. Click on the icon, get the profile page.

Tan Lucy Pez said...

*Pausing for breath* I gotta get in here more often, but I'd rather read YOUR blogs.

Jamie D: I'm just so grateful for HAIR. Some women do lose it!

Aral: NO! Under 40 is young! My gosh! When my sis Mary turned 60, I asked my Mama if that made her feel old. "No!" she said as if I were nuts. "But, it sure makes me feel that she's old!" That Mama.

veej: I do feel young inside. Have to avoid mirrors though.

Meegan: Yeah. danced in our socks. The gym floor was refinished once a year, during the summer after the Senior Prom. The prom was held IN THE GYM, and the floor was battered by all that dancing in shoes. Today's teens go to proms in fancy hotels.

Tan Lucy Pez said...

*gasping for air* No way anyone is reading this damn thing now. But I'm goin' on. And on. No one can stop me now...

Monika: She speaks english that well?

Hoss: You ain't missin' one synapse!

Tom and Icy: Thanks.

Big Dave T: Hi! Yep. Old is sad and funny. Like Tim Conway.

Fred: What kinda wine? Where's mine?

Acton: Hey sweetie. You're one of the things that has changed on me.

Savtadotty: Yeah! I saw it.

Barbara: If I ever figure out anything, you guys will be the first to know. But...don't hold your breath. I'm not even getting close to being any smarter.

Fred said...

TLP: A nice Chardonnay. We'll leave a glass out for you if you happen to drop by. (Hopefully, Owen won't get it first.)

Saur♥Kraut said...

Funny you should post about this today. I was just talking to my ex-husband about his mom. She's not doing well (she has a variety of illnesses and always has) but when we started discussing it, we both suddenly discovered that she is 74. How odd that we knew that WE were aging but never assumed our parents were. Both sets of our parents are also very young looking (as we are) and that adds to the deception. I am creeped out by the whole thing.

natasha said...

Okay, I have to ask ... What the heck is a "skate key"? I knew what everything else was, but skate key, no.

(Lovely post, of course, but I expect nothing less from you, by now.)

Monique said...

I love your blog -- you're so funny! I'm kinda looking forward to the day when I don't worry about holding in my stomach...

WordWhiz said...

I just hate getting old! I posted something about the year 2030 on my blog and one of my readers said that she'll be 50 then!! 50??? My son will be nearly 50 then!! I didn't think of myself as old before, but boy, did that make me feel old!

Tan Lucy Pez said...

Nat: How to describe a skate key? Well, kids used to wear skates that fit on the bottoms of your shoes. The didn't actully FIT very well, and you needed to tighten them with a "key." Google it. A picture really is worth a lotta words on this.

Saur: We all get old or get dead. 100%.

Monique: Do you really have a stomach that needs holding in? Probably not.

WordWhiz: When I was in the sixth grade I figured out that I would be 58 when the year turned 2000. I also figured that I would either be dead, or too old to care. WRONG.
Now, in 2030, I'll be 88 for most of the year. I'll either be dead or too old to care. FOR SURE. Maybe.

Fred. Thanks. Nice taste.

jon said...

I am looking everywhere for walking shoes and walking shoes, while doing so I somehow stumbled onto your walking shoes blog. I am happy to say I learned something and will look into this further...

Thanks for the great posts...

jon

Anonymous said...

Looking for information and found it at this great site... Allpay online payment brunet maternity style clothes Cheep paris xenical http://www.the-prince-of-tennis-cartoons.info/Description-of-antidepressant-classes-in-powerpoint.html Stone look home decor Jenison auto sales inventory Foam mattress memory restonic Consumer opinions on pat wexler skin care Ford 460 stroker kits winter maternity clothes australia http://www.soccercleatsize144e.info/Cabinetsco.html Zyrtec allertec Legend trail golf pickles and icecream maternity clothes seo training course mali hairy homemade porn 1986 isuzu pickup spacecab Alliance soccer sonoma