Saturday, July 02, 2005

I'm not bitter

I'm relaxing now that Bonnie is GONE. YES! She's gone!

Now you probably think I'm conscience-stricken about being happy that she's gone, but you are WRONG. I'm elated. Jumping for joy. Happy as a pig in mud. Satisfied as a chigger full of blood. Relaxed as a 'gator in the sun. Jubilant as a lark in a birdbath. Carefree as...oh well, you get the picture.

She cost me a bundle, which is okay. She had a good time.
Two weeks of my life, no big deal.
She told my kids a few stories about me...that I could have done without! LOL.

I was a mean little devil to her when we were kids. Hey. She was two years older than I. She should have been able to take up for herself.
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Fred said...

I had to go to to see what a chigger was. I just learned something.

If you have another sister, I can hardly wait for all the stories! I'm almost hoping my brother would visit now; I could blog about him for at least a month.

jevanking™ said...


You didn't know what a chigger was? Amazing.


"Satisfied as a chigger full of blood."

That's kind of gross and funny at the same time :).

dddragon said...

lol ~ that's the South for you. CHIGGERS!!

Here's another phrase I learned not to say up North: "So ugly he looked like he'd been whupped with an UGLY stick!"

OldHorsetailSnake said...

Ah, crap. NOW what are you going to do to amuse Ol' Hoss? I never had so much fun since gramma caught her boob in the wringer.

Come back, Bonnie!!

Tan Lucy Pez said...

Fred, I cannot believe you never had a chigger itch! Sadly, our other two sisters have died.

Jess, gross and funny are good, no?

dragon, doesn't everyone say that?

Hoss, I've seen that happen, ain't funny McGee.

AP3 said...

"Satisfied as a chigger full of blood?" Wow!

dddragon: I always say, "... looked like s/he fell out of an ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down!"

I want to hear the stories about you, Tan!

Jamie Dawn said...

Funny, funny, funny!
I take it you're feeling good about Bonnie's absence.
PLEASE tell us the stories she told about you!
I'll bet you were a hellion!
Poor Bonnie!
Families are so much fun to blog about.
My mom has 14 brothers and sisters which means I have a lot of aunts, uncles, and cousins.
I could blog for decades...

Fred said...

I guess I've been sheltered; it seems I'm the only person who didn't know what a chigger was. And I'm the teacher!

Tan Lucy Pez said...

Fred, that just means that you haven't played in the weeds. Or camped out a lot. Or rolled in the hay. Gee, you have been sheltered!

dddragon said...

Hey, mom, tell Granny stories! I love the ones about her getting married, getting off the plane, and greeting you at the door with the "sad news"!!

Of course, you should relate your Elvis story. Oh, and babysitting! You'll keep everyone in stitches for days!

Tom & Icy said...

Chiggers always puzzled me as a kid, you'd never see them, but, boy! you sure knew that they were there! Sort of like a bad tooth fairy.

GodlessMom said...

Don't feel bad Fred. I didn't know what a chigger was until I moved to the south 5 years ago. Boy will I be glad when I can leave the little buggers behind! They suck...literally.

actonbell said...

Blaaa! Let's not talk about blood...

Bonnie's definitely cryin' out for more than just psychiatric help.

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