Wednesday, July 20, 2005

Dirty soap



FIRST: Today is my twin granddaughters' birthday. They aren't here to give me cake and ice cream. Boo. They are so sweet. Also pretty. I miss them.

OKAY:

I'm out of sorts, so I think that I will pick on Little Bar of Soap. She's due for a pickin' on. Besides, being unstable and bitchy is all part of my mystique.

Little Bar of Soap is ugly and her mother dresses her funny.
How do we know she's really clean?
I heard that her feet stink. (That's better than smelling that her feet stink.)
If Jesus is watching, shouldn't we give him a good show? Soapy is trying to make us look boring.
There's a rumor that Soap is a cross-dresser. That's good news. They usually dress better than that dress she's wearing on her site.
She has no taste in politicians.
She dyes her hair.
She doesn't shave her legs.
Or her pits.

Okay Soapy. Hit me with you best shot.

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22 comments:

AP3 said...

Oooo... You're cruisin' for a bruisin', TLP! Sister Soapy will be upset when she sees this!

The Lazy Iguana said...

This could be good. I will pull up a chair, open a beer, and do up some microwave popcorn.

mireille said...

I never saw I'd see this here. Come on honey, all you need is a little extra Premarin. Come on, let me help you -- swig some of this scotch with it. You'll be ok. xoxo

mireille said...

Thought. I never thought I'd see this here. Um, one two many India Pale Ales. sorry! especially sorry, little bar of soap! xoxo

GABRIEL C. ZOLMAN said...

"Clean freak" sounds like a Christian who is also into S&M, or a lathered up gimp.

I finally updated, btw. It should be sufficiently embarassing for you.

)+(

GodlessMom said...

Oh, this should be good!

A Little Bar of Soap said...

Friends, and TLP too: I have responded to this vile attack at

A Little Bar of Soap said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
BarbaraFromCalifornia said...

Yipes...Here's hoping that the potential mess can be cleaned up with that soap!

Happy belated birthday to the twins!

Doug said...

Tan Lucy, you sure know how to have a good time. I'm praying for you.

Fred said...

I love catfights!

Tom & Icy said...

Wow! I think I should just turn the Devil's blog over to you!

OldHorsetailSnake said...

I told Soapy what to do with you. You are in for it.

weirsdo said...

Dear Tan-U-See,
PLEASE do not get vilelint!!!! Unless you want to broadcast it on Stuffed Animal Planet (you can contact Mr. Banana about that).
But anyhoo, Little Everlastingly Soapy Bar of Sop (LESBOS) has said some pretty mean and unChristinane things about me and are show, but I just turn the other cheek so she can spank that one to!!!!!

Doug said...

Sure hope the Doctor is in.

Tan Lucy Pez said...

Little Bar of Soap, Pansi said...
LESBOS! WooWoo.

It is true Soapy, that you have said (written anyway) some unkind things about a lot of us.

But I'm sorry that I said something mean about your mother. I bet your mother was WONDERFUL. I bet I would LOVE your mother. She was probably a saint or something.

mireille said...

thanks for today's comment TLP. It's meaningful to me. xoxo

Jamie Dawn said...

You can use all the soap in the world, but leg and armpit hair gone wild is just, plain hitonious!
Little Bar is going to pray the God punishes you for this.
Let the fireworks begin!

Doug said...

When's the wrasslin'?

AP3 said...

You've been soaped, TLP!

actonbell said...

Um, Little Bar of Soap doesn't have to shave because you know she keeps everything covered up!

Saur♥Kraut said...

Tan Lucy, careful or you'll get your mouth washed out with soap! Happy b-day to your brilliant twinnies!