What's in YOUR grape juice?

Radio question of the day:

Forty six percent of computer users say they have done this. What is it?

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What I learned today:

In 1815 French chemist Michael Eugene Chevreul realized the first link between diabetes and sugar metabolism when he discovered that the urine of a diabetic was identical to grape sugar.

It never occurred to me to worry about what else those grape stompers might be doin' in the barrel there. Now I wanta know why it occurred to ol' Michael Eugene that grapes and urine had anything in common. I mean, what was that boy drinkin'?

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Answer to the Radio Question of the Day:

Hit the computer. Oh, yeah! Been there. Done that.
Only 46 percent? Huh! Guess some folks drop kick the thing.

Along came a spider...

Radio question of the day:

The cartoon character Popeye had four nephews. What were their names?
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What I learned today:

The Black Widow is considered the most venomous spider in North America. The venom of the black widow spider is 15 times as toxic as the venom of the prairie rattlesnake. BUT, Black Widow spiders are not usually deadly, especially to adults, because they inject only a small amount of venom when they bite.

Only the female Black Widow is venomous; males and juveniles are harmless.

Female black widow spiders will usually eat the male after mating. Yum, yum. The female then lays several batches of eggs, containing up to 750 eggs each, in one summer. Normally, only 1 to 12 young survive after the egg incubation period of 14 to 30 days due to cannibalism. Those little boogers.

Already more than I wanted to know.

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Answer to the Radio question of the day:


The names of Popeye's four nephews are Pipeye, Peepeye, Pupeye, and Poopeye.

Never heard of 'em. I'm not makin' this stuff up.

Big stuff

What I learned today:

A Kitti's hog-nosed bat (also called bumblebee bat) from Thailand is the world's smallest mammal. It's only 1.2 inches long and weighs 0.07 ounces.

Ya know how much does an adult moose weighs?

Males weigh 1,200 to 1,600 pounds, and females 800 to 1,300 pounds.

The heaviest person in medical history was Jon Brower Minnoch (USA, 1941–1983), who suffered from obesity since childhood. He was 6 ft 1 in tall and weighed 1,400 lbs.

I'd say large and in charge. Kinda like Cheyney, huh?

What I learned today

I said that I was going to learn something every day. So here's what I learned today.

It takes forty pigs to make four thousand sausages.

Isn't it amazing what you can teach them?

Just a bunch of nothin'

Radio question of the day:
What is the most common fib someone will tell to someone they've just met?

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I've decided to learn at least one new thing everyday this year. This is what I learned today: The average garden snail (not one that has entered the Olympics 100 meters race) moves at around 0.03 mph. If a snail set out on New Year's Day 2005, and walked non-stop it would have travelled 263 miles by New Year's Day 2006. If you walked this same distance non-stop you would complete it in around three days. You guys! You musta stopped for lunch or somethin'. So I learned that snails can walk. I didn't know that.

Ya know why chocolate is better than a man?
Chocolate never tries to chat up your best friend. ( I was gonna say, chocolate is better than a man because after telling your chocolate bar all your worries you can simply eat it. But I decided against that. So I did NOT say that. So don't go there.)

Today when I did the wash, and then I took the stuff out of the washer, I discovered that there musta been a tissue in the pocket of something. Of course, the entire laundry came out covered with lint. Don'tcha hate that? How can one measly little Kleenex go so far?

That's as bad as the days when you start to hang up the clothes you wore home from the party you went to the night before... and there aren't any. Don'tcha hate that? Speaking of waking up in the morning, did ya ever notice that men wake up as good-looking as they were when they went to bed? We women somehow deteriorate during the night. What's up with that?

Oh! I learned somethin' else today! It's a household tip: Old telephone directories make ideal personal address books. Just cross out the names and address of people you don't know. Sweet!

Something else I learned is that putting just the right amount of gin in your goldfish bowl makes the fishes' eyes bulge and causes them to swim in an amusing manner. But that's just wrong. Don't waste gin like that.

Lotsa people are complaining about gaining weight over the holidays. I do know a diet tip: You can lose weight fast by eating raw chicken or rancid tuna. The food poisoning/diarrhea that you get will enable you to lose 12 pounds in only 2 days. I haven't tested that. I didn't gain weight this year. Let me know if it works.

Of course if you've paid attention to this site during the past year you would know how to avoid that weight gain in the first place. I've told you before that anything consumed while standing up has no calories. This is due to gravity and the density of the caloric mass. You haven't been sitting at the table, have you?

Cookie pieces contain no calories. The process of breaking causes calorie leakage. Naturally you can't be eating unbroken cookies. That goes without saying. Plus if you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories. If you've been eating in front of people, well, you're just askin' for it.

An exception to this is, if you eat with someone else, you have to eat off their plate. Anything consumed from someone else's plate has no calories since the calories rightfully belong to the other person and will cling to his/her plate. (We ALL know how calories like to cling!)

I gotta get busy here watching television. It's Washington Week In Review night. You all know how cultured I am and stuff. I can't be wasting time blogging. I sure wasted your time though.

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Answer to the radio question of the day:
What they do for a living.

Huh! Now that makes no sense whatsoever! I'm surprised at you guys.

Trash talk

Radio question of the day:

Sixty percent of us have never participated in this holiday tradition. What is it?

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I took our tree down today. It's a permanent tree, so it's in the basement now, stored away.

But for all those real trees, what once was so lovely and loved, is now out by the curb. All over our little borough Christmas trees have been set out to the trash. Sad.

A special truck will pick them up and take them to be composted. That's good I guess.
Still, it's sad to me.

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Answer to radio question of the day:
Roasting chestnuts

I've never done that. Have you?

It's all about YOU

Radio question of the day:
U.S. insurance companies pay out about a billion dollars a year to people who make a claim for this. What is it?

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This post is all about YOU.

You should yield to temptation; it may not pass your way again.
You can observe a lot just by watching. (Yogi Berra)
You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty.
You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish.
You can't have everything; where would you put it? (Steven Wright)
You can't tell a book by its movie.
You don't know anything about a person until you meet them in court.
You don't learn a thing the second time the mule kicks you!
You either do or you don't, there is no try. (Yoda, "The Empire Strikes Back")
You have the God-given right to go out and step on a land mine.
You have to know what you're looking for before you can find it. (D. Gerrold)
You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither. (Steve Martin)
You live and learn, or you don't live long.
You may already be a loser. (Sweepstakes letter to Rodney Dangerfield)
You raise your voice when you should reinforce your argument.
You will never see a cat obedience school. (Don Addis)
You're losing your mind. I saw it running down the hall about 10 minutes ago.
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on. (Dean Martin)
You're not going to believe this, so I'm not going to tell you.
You're only young once, but you can be immature for the rest of your life.
You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.
You're twisted, perverted, and sick. I like that in a person.
Your Zip file is open.
Your proctologist called, they found your head.
Your program is sick! Shoot it and put it out of its memory.
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Answer to the radio question of the day: Dog bites.

Ya know, there are a bunch of dogs around these here blog hills.

Random testing

Boy are YOU bored. Checkin' in on ol' Lucy here. Pitiful. I'm never up to anything good.

Seven Tag

I know my seven-digit phone number, my three-digit area code, and my nine-digit zip code. What I don't know is, what is the digit thingie anyway?


Sauerkraut tagged me, so I'll be a good girl and get this out of the way.

Seven things I want to do before I die:

1. See the pyramids
2. Watch my granddaughters mature and be educated
3. See Paris again
4. Be well until I die
5. Write down my life
6. Spend more time with my daughters
7. Take my husband on a cruise

Seven things I can do:

1. Draw pretty well
2. Keep a clean house
3. Have patience
4. Walk forever
5. Bend over and touch the floor without bending my knees
6. Make a good pecan pie
7. Remember lyrics to old songs

Seven things I can't do:

1. Carry a tune in a bucket (or a paper bag)
2. Crochet
3. Water ski
4. Play a musical instrument
5. Sit in the lotus position
6. Keep my mouth shut
7. Sit still

Seven things that attract me to another person:

1. A generous spirit
2. Gentleness
3. Brains
4. Thoughtfulness
5. Humility
6. Integrity
7. Sense of humor

Seven things I say most often:

1. That guy.
2. Well, I never!
3. Just sayin'
4. Yeah, yeah
5. Holy tuna
6. Anyway
7. I love you today (a running joke between my husband and me)

Seven people to do this game:

I don't think most people like to be tagged. But think it over. If you don't have an idea for a post today, here's an "easy button."

O.D.I.M

It seems to be Monday again.