Rabbit Rabbit

It's March again. Amazing.

So, you know that you have to say Rabbit Rabbit in order to have good luck in March, right?

I think I'll just pull a rabbit out of a hat. Hey Rocky watch me pull a rabbit out of the hat! That Bullwinkle. That old trick never works.



Poor old Moose.

I'll try again.


This isn't going so well.



Silly Rabbit! Tricks is for kids.

I may give up.



I must be doing something wrong! Why can't I draw a rabbit out of a hat?


Oh, bother! That Rabbit. I guess that old trick really never works after all.

Nothing to say

Radio Question of the Day:
Studies show, doing this after a workout can reduce muscle pain. What is it?
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I have absolutely nothing to say, but I shouldn't leave the Inappropriate Card Day post up when it's no longer Inappropriate Card Day. Or should I? What is the appropriate thing to do????
Is it appropriate to send Inappropriate Cards on the incorrect day?

Anywho, an old-fart friend sent me this, so I'm dumpin' it on ya here:

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" -She is an "AMPLE BREASTED AMERICAN."

2. She is not "AN EASY PIECE OF TAIL" - She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE." (Ain't that the best kind?)

3. She is not a "DUMB BLOND" - She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."

4. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION." That Paris Hilton.

5. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE." (And why didn't you just listen in the first damn place?)

6. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER."

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a "LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."

2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."

3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS." (Some investigate them to hell and back.)

4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION." (Or it's Britney in jeans.)

5. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION." (Or he's a total ass. It happens.)

6. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's "REAR CLEAVAGE." Those plumbers. (Guess it could be Britney again, climbin' out of a cab. But, no, then you'd see the Cesarean scar.)

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Answer to the Radio Question of the Day:

Drinking coffee (Source: Journal of Pain)
Now, see, I just go ahead and drink the coffee. Why take chances by exercising in the first place?

Isn't this a cute little "plumber in training?"

Inappropriate Card Day

Listen up! Diesel says that it's Inappropriate Card Day! Whoa! I love this!

So, do it!
Just realized that this is my 400th post. Whoopie Ding Dong.

Heat Wave

Well, it had to happen. We're having a heat wave. It must be 50 degrees, and it's bright and sunny. It's still pretty with the snow and all, but it won't last long at this rate.

Fastnacht Day

Tuesday, February 20, 2007 is a strange and wonderful convergence of events.

Central PA is more fun than lots of places. We have "days" that other places don't. For us, today is Fastnacht Day. That’s Fat Tuesday in Pennsylvania Dutch country. It’s the day before Ash Wednesday and the tasty tradition is to use up all the fat in the house before Lent begins. So folks line up at bakeries and outside church kitchens to buy and eat all kinds of Pennsylvania German sweets, but most particularly, fastnachts. That’s a very hearty, doughnut-like pastry. It’s deep fried and you can have it plain or with sugar toppings. A true fastnacht doesn't have a hole. They are calorie free of course. So you should have two or three or more, and all the coffee you like. Would I lie?

But, wait! There’s more. I don’t know (or care) who decided exactly when Hootie Hoo Day is, but this year it’s also this Tuesday, February 20. On Hootie Hoo Day you stick your head out the front door at high noon, and yell "Hootie Hoo" three times. This is to scare Old Man Winter away. Some folks claim that you have to be naked when you do this. Those people. Although, I’m thinking my being naked in my doorway might be pretty scary at that.

Have a great Fastnacht Day!

Not my fault

I would just like to mention that I wanted snow, and lots of it. But it's not my fault that we got a bunch of snow, then inches of sleet on top of that, then freezing rain on top of that.

Our faithful snow-removal service came and dug us out. They couldn't use even their giant snow blowers because the ice and sheet and snow are so HEAVY. They had to use a truck with a scraper to dig out the driveway. Then, poor guys, had to chop and shovel the walk. Yikes. I gave them a HUGE tip on top of the fee. I'm easy, but I ain't cheap.

You gonna eat that?

Happy Valentine's Day!

Rumors of snow

Radio Question of the Day:

Schools close for the holidays in North Pole, Alaska, but under what other conditions do North Pole schools close?
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Did you make snow ice cream when you were a kid? My sisters and I did. You have to make sure that the snow is clean and WHITE. No yellow snow! Those dogs. The best way is to put out a big bowl and let the snow fall into it rather than scooping up snow that has already fallen.

Snow Ice Cream

Big bowl of fresh snow
1 to 2 cups Milk (Whole milk is better than skim or low fat.)
1to 2 tsp. Vanilla Extract
1/2 to 1 cup Sugar

Take a large bowl of snow and quickly stir in just enough milk to make the right consistency of ice cream. Start with about 1/2 cup and keep going until you have enough to make the snow creamy. If you add too much milk and it becomes runny, just add some more snow. Then stir in a little vanilla and sugar, and you've got yourself snow ice cream! You really need to eat it immediately.


We still don't have snow, but there are rumors that on Tuesday we will finally get our first real snow. So far we've had "traces." I sure would love to make snow ice cream again.

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Answer to the Radio Question of the Day:

Only when the temperature drops to 50 below zero or colder. Hoo Boy!

Back home, is it spring yet?

My daughters and I had a ball in Punxsutawney PA, visiting Phil, the world's most famous groundhog. Isn't it strange how we adore this little rodent up in Punxsutawney, but hate the same type beast in our yards?

There was plenty of snow, and so I finally got my snow "fix." It was also cold, which doesn't bother me at all.

Here are 3D (left) and Acton Bell in groundhog hats:



I had a crazy groundhog hat too, not the same as either of theirs of course. I've got my pride.

All over town there are groundhogs which are decorated in various themes. Here's Acton Bell with one:


This one is a bellhop, and is in front of our hotel, the Pantall.

Here's me with another one, which is right in the park, next to where Phil lives.



Naturally we called AP3, to say Rabbit Rabbit on February 1, and then again from Gobblers Knob to interrupt her and generally annoy her and wish her a Happy Groundhog Day on February 2.

We just had a hoot the whole time. Y'all should try it some year.